Business as usual is over.
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I shared the following on my social media channels on May 31st, and in case you missed it, here it is:
My work, at it's essence, is about unleashing women to take charge of their lives.
We do this through having our own business.
This requires enormous courage.
Today I’m asking my white readers, especially women, to listen and to be even more courageous.
It’s time to listen.
This means you, my fellow coach and business owner, my high school friend, my relative, my neighbors.
I'm talking to you, a white woman, because you're the one in your family seeking out new info, handling it all and then some. You're the one taking the course, going back to school, applying for that promotion, staying home to do the thankless work AND making dinner.
It’s time to be courageous.
Perhaps at first in small ways, as that’s how courage works. It builds up over time. Like a muscle.
Now for the listening: Our Black fellow citizens need our help.
You may be resistant to this, at least in part...
I'll admit, my first reaction to racial justice education was..."But I'm not a racist. I see people as equal. And I'm a first generation American, I didn't have ancestors with slaves."
Followed by "It's all just too much! I barely have enough juice for my business, family and mindset around INSERT ALL THE THINGS.”
Topped it all with some overwhelm and sickening feeling.
Maybe you don’t know where to start.
Maybe no one ever helped you, and you had a tough life, too, so you feel a bit offended at being called into this convo.
Maybe you're offended at being remotely thought of as racist.
Or like me, you don't really want to talk about race. That's for "others" who are into politics and other radical things. Right?
Okay, now we've got that out of the way.
Now for the courage.
Turning away from the discomfort of this conversation is a privilege afforded to white people alone.
Please read that again.
Do not turn away.
Do not succumb to the patriarchal order of things that encourages your silence.
We need your voice.
Here’s how you can start.
Right now.
1) Get the book "Antagonists, Advocates and Allies" by Catrice M Jackson.
If you're new to this, just get this book. Buy it and read it before you do anything else.
There are other books if this one isn't for you. Don't let that stop you.
2) Select one racial justice educator to quietly follow for a few weeks.
I say quietly, because PLEASE DO NOT DM (direct message) them or pepper ANY Black person with your questions.
They are exhausted, traumatized and there is already a rich offering of free and low cost "unlearning" resources for you to go through at your own pace.
It is not Black people's job to get you up to speed or help you with your feelings about this. You will learn why if you do a little homework.
Please share who you're learning from in the comments on this Facebook post or IG post, or will learn from starting now. I'll share a few, too.
If you can, donate to the resources they recommend.
3) Commit to facing the discomfort of doing what you can AND taking care of yourself.
It's not an either or thing. It's an AND THING.
Taking breaks for life's little pleasures that refuel you is essential AND doing what you can for Black people who are on the front lines of this work.
Telling yourself you’re too overwhelmed is unconscious white fragility and white privilege at work.
Don't believe the lie that the small thing you can do won't do much so why bother.
This is discomfort with a purpose.
This is not self improvement work.
Nor does it matter if you're a Republican, Democrat, Libertarian or otherwise.
It is humanitarian work.
Fair warning, you will eventually be called out if you don't get smart about this. It is inevitable. I'm already seeing it happen to coaching companies who are staying silent.
I've been way too worried about being "polite" about the conscious and unconscious racism I run into, and thus freezing up when it happens.
I've been doing a little studying about racial justice for the past year, and still, I just didn't have the courage to talk to anyone about it, let alone my email list.
And I now see how hurtful that is to Black people. I will do better.
Going forward, I also will be more explicit in my marketing materials, and ongoing marketing about where I stand, what kind of small company I run, where my contributions go, so you know who I am and who you're buying from. (Should you ever choose to want to coach with me.)
And yes, my Brown and Asian friends, I know this is leaving your experience out. I know racial injustice happens to you.
Remember this...
A well-behaved woman never changed the world, or a family history or a community.
Go make waves.
Karin